Forgiveness
I asked to speak about forgiveness because it had come up in a couple of situations, such as my Tuesday night life group, and God has given me a couple of insights into forgiveness I wanted to share.
To forgive others and be forgiven by God is essential for our salvation, health and well being.
Forgiveness is letting go of the desire to see someone punished for their sin and leaving them in God’s hands. It isn’t necessarily preventing them from facing punishment for their sin, me may forgive someone for child abuse and turn them over to the police. It is extremely important, we are only forgiven our sins as we forgive others their sins:
Matt. 18:21-35 (NIV), ‘Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?”
Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven.
“Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.
“The servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant's master took pity on him, cancelled the debt and let him go.
“But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.
“His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’
“But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened.
“Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I cancelled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”’
This Scripture and many like it reveal that we must forgive each other if we want to be forgiven our sins by God.
It also reveals that God knows that sometimes the sins committed against us are great, a hundred denarii is almost eight months wages for an average labourer, but that they do not compare with what we have been forgiven - ten thousand talents is about 6000 times as much, or about 4000 years wages.
Forgiveness of sins is linked to healing:
Matt. 9:5-7 (NIV), ‘“Which is easier: to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up and walk’? But so that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins. . . .” Then he said to the paralytic, “Get up, take your mat and go home.” And the man got up and went home.’
I wanted to give you another example of healing related to forgiveness of sin but I couldn’t find one, this is the only example in the bible but it is repeated in all of the first three gospels so it is important.
In a biography of Smiths Wigglesworth it mentions that there was one time when he was instructed not to pray for someone because that person needed to forgive someone before they could be healed.
That there is one example of this for Jesus and Smiths Wigglesworth indicates this is fairly rare, because both of these people healed thousands of people (actually I don't know how many people Smiths Wigglesworth healed, but that is the impression I get from what I have read of him).
According to Reader’s Digest even secular psychiatrists believe 90% of psychiatric illness would be cured if people just forgave.
Forgiveness is linked to salvation and the gospel message:
Luke 1:77 (NIV), “to give his people the knowledge of salvation through the forgiveness of their sins,”
This was the message God gave to John the Baptist.
Acts 2:38 (NIV), ‘Peter replied, “Repent and be baptised, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.”’
One thing about forgiveness is that the need for it comes from our perception of a situation rather than what is actually occurring. Thus we may need to forgive someone for something that was really a blessing if we perceived that we were wronged. This means we may have things we need to forgive God for, not because of anything God did but because of our perception of what God did.
There is a school of counselling called Elijah House which is pretty much based on forgiveness and repentance. One of the things they talk about is the importance of honouring parents, and the chains of circumstances in our lives that judging them and not forgiving them can set up. For example if we find we are continually sinned against in a particular way it may be that a sin committed against us in early childhood that we have not forgiven but have judged whomever committed it (probably a parent for it to have had such an impact) may have set us up to be judged again and again. The same can be true of a sin we continually fall into. That is, not forgiving a sin committed against us in childhood, particularly by a parent, can lead us to be judged as we have judged others and either a pattern of being sinned against in the same way or to a pattern of repeatedly committing the same sin ourselves, or even both. This is one reason why children of parents where there was adultery are more likely to commit adultery themselves even though they are more painfully aware of its negative consequences than others.
Lets take Fred as a ficticious example. Fred’s father leaves his mother for another woman for a while during his childhood. Fred judges his father with bitterness and unforgiveness without realising it. Later on Fred finds that although he hates adultery because of what it did to his family, for some reason he can’t understand he breaks every relationship he gets into by committing adultery. Finally Fred gets some counselling, sees what’s going on, forgives his father, repents of judging him, and breaks the pattern. He will probably also have to forgive his mother for allowing it to happen even if it had nothing to do with her doing anything wrong, as I mentioned earlier it is Fred’s perception that is the problem.
Sometimes this can be more of a problem with good parents because a person may believe they had nothing to forgive their parents for, therefore they don’t have any unforgiveness. Whereas, because none of us has perfect parents and it’s to do with our perception of being wronged rather than what really happened, we may have stuff we need to forgive.
Forgiveness isn’t always easy. When Corrie Ten Boom was confronted by one of her Nazi prison guards who had pack raped her sister who had become a Christian who said something like, “I’m so glad you can forgive me, because if you can forgive me then I know God can.” She prayed to God silently something like, “I can’t forgive this man in myself, you’ll have to be forgiveness through me.”
In my own life I’ve found the Scripture “But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous” (Matt. 5:44-45 NIV) particularly useful. Unforgiveness blinds us to things which make it easy to forgive or would cause us to realise there is nothing to forgive. I was praying for the blessing of a motor cycle mechanic who had made a mess of my motor cycle and God opened my eyes to the fact that it wasn’t his fault, the problems stemmed from an accident it had had before I bought it. The information that conclusion was based on was there for me to see before I prayed for his blessing but I couldn’t see it while I was coming at it with a hardened heart.
Praying for someone’s blessing not only softens our heart and helps us get God’s perspective on things but often people causing us problems are having problems of their own, and as they are dealt with the person can become a source of blessing for others. As the Scripture says. “If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you.” (Proverbs 25:21-22 NIV). I’ve heard that in those days the way someone lit their fire was that someone came around with a bowl of burning coals on their head in the morning and you took one to light your fire with, thus heaping burning coals on someone’s head made that person a blessing to others. Whether that is meant by this Scripture or not, it does work like that.
If even using these tricks we are having difficulty forgiving someone then the next best thing we can do is ask God to enable us to forgive them.
To make my point again then, to forgive others and be forgiven by God is essential for our salvation, health and well being.
Blessings,
Joe :-)
To forgive others and be forgiven by God is essential for our salvation, health and well being.
Forgiveness is letting go of the desire to see someone punished for their sin and leaving them in God’s hands. It isn’t necessarily preventing them from facing punishment for their sin, me may forgive someone for child abuse and turn them over to the police. It is extremely important, we are only forgiven our sins as we forgive others their sins:
Matt. 18:21-35 (NIV), ‘Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?”
Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven.
“Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.
“The servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant's master took pity on him, cancelled the debt and let him go.
“But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.
“His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’
“But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened.
“Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I cancelled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”’
This Scripture and many like it reveal that we must forgive each other if we want to be forgiven our sins by God.
It also reveals that God knows that sometimes the sins committed against us are great, a hundred denarii is almost eight months wages for an average labourer, but that they do not compare with what we have been forgiven - ten thousand talents is about 6000 times as much, or about 4000 years wages.
Forgiveness of sins is linked to healing:
Matt. 9:5-7 (NIV), ‘“Which is easier: to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up and walk’? But so that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins. . . .” Then he said to the paralytic, “Get up, take your mat and go home.” And the man got up and went home.’
I wanted to give you another example of healing related to forgiveness of sin but I couldn’t find one, this is the only example in the bible but it is repeated in all of the first three gospels so it is important.
In a biography of Smiths Wigglesworth it mentions that there was one time when he was instructed not to pray for someone because that person needed to forgive someone before they could be healed.
That there is one example of this for Jesus and Smiths Wigglesworth indicates this is fairly rare, because both of these people healed thousands of people (actually I don't know how many people Smiths Wigglesworth healed, but that is the impression I get from what I have read of him).
According to Reader’s Digest even secular psychiatrists believe 90% of psychiatric illness would be cured if people just forgave.
Forgiveness is linked to salvation and the gospel message:
Luke 1:77 (NIV), “to give his people the knowledge of salvation through the forgiveness of their sins,”
This was the message God gave to John the Baptist.
Acts 2:38 (NIV), ‘Peter replied, “Repent and be baptised, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.”’
One thing about forgiveness is that the need for it comes from our perception of a situation rather than what is actually occurring. Thus we may need to forgive someone for something that was really a blessing if we perceived that we were wronged. This means we may have things we need to forgive God for, not because of anything God did but because of our perception of what God did.
There is a school of counselling called Elijah House which is pretty much based on forgiveness and repentance. One of the things they talk about is the importance of honouring parents, and the chains of circumstances in our lives that judging them and not forgiving them can set up. For example if we find we are continually sinned against in a particular way it may be that a sin committed against us in early childhood that we have not forgiven but have judged whomever committed it (probably a parent for it to have had such an impact) may have set us up to be judged again and again. The same can be true of a sin we continually fall into. That is, not forgiving a sin committed against us in childhood, particularly by a parent, can lead us to be judged as we have judged others and either a pattern of being sinned against in the same way or to a pattern of repeatedly committing the same sin ourselves, or even both. This is one reason why children of parents where there was adultery are more likely to commit adultery themselves even though they are more painfully aware of its negative consequences than others.
Lets take Fred as a ficticious example. Fred’s father leaves his mother for another woman for a while during his childhood. Fred judges his father with bitterness and unforgiveness without realising it. Later on Fred finds that although he hates adultery because of what it did to his family, for some reason he can’t understand he breaks every relationship he gets into by committing adultery. Finally Fred gets some counselling, sees what’s going on, forgives his father, repents of judging him, and breaks the pattern. He will probably also have to forgive his mother for allowing it to happen even if it had nothing to do with her doing anything wrong, as I mentioned earlier it is Fred’s perception that is the problem.
Sometimes this can be more of a problem with good parents because a person may believe they had nothing to forgive their parents for, therefore they don’t have any unforgiveness. Whereas, because none of us has perfect parents and it’s to do with our perception of being wronged rather than what really happened, we may have stuff we need to forgive.
Forgiveness isn’t always easy. When Corrie Ten Boom was confronted by one of her Nazi prison guards who had pack raped her sister who had become a Christian who said something like, “I’m so glad you can forgive me, because if you can forgive me then I know God can.” She prayed to God silently something like, “I can’t forgive this man in myself, you’ll have to be forgiveness through me.”
In my own life I’ve found the Scripture “But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous” (Matt. 5:44-45 NIV) particularly useful. Unforgiveness blinds us to things which make it easy to forgive or would cause us to realise there is nothing to forgive. I was praying for the blessing of a motor cycle mechanic who had made a mess of my motor cycle and God opened my eyes to the fact that it wasn’t his fault, the problems stemmed from an accident it had had before I bought it. The information that conclusion was based on was there for me to see before I prayed for his blessing but I couldn’t see it while I was coming at it with a hardened heart.
Praying for someone’s blessing not only softens our heart and helps us get God’s perspective on things but often people causing us problems are having problems of their own, and as they are dealt with the person can become a source of blessing for others. As the Scripture says. “If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you.” (Proverbs 25:21-22 NIV). I’ve heard that in those days the way someone lit their fire was that someone came around with a bowl of burning coals on their head in the morning and you took one to light your fire with, thus heaping burning coals on someone’s head made that person a blessing to others. Whether that is meant by this Scripture or not, it does work like that.
If even using these tricks we are having difficulty forgiving someone then the next best thing we can do is ask God to enable us to forgive them.
To make my point again then, to forgive others and be forgiven by God is essential for our salvation, health and well being.
Blessings,
Joe :-)
posted by Joe at
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
2 Comments:
This is a sermon I preached on Sunday night. Just a short one, but I think it is powerful.
I left out the bit at the end where I was giving suggestions as to what to do if we're having difficulty forgiving someone and I said "Also, as anyone who was at this mornings service will know, you can pray for a greater recognition of how God has blessed us."
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